Joining in...

Let me introduce myself- I am Chelsea, George’s little sister.

It took me some time to feel comfortable blogging and be a large part of the foundation. I had some of my own healing and growth to experience.

Maybe my own grief process was holding me back. I placed limitations on myself because of my own fears and insecurities.

Life has handed my family a lot of challenges, but we have remained each other’s core and rock, so that our strength can keep us moving forward.

The family that is left is me and my mom.

We have each other’s backs no matter what.

Here is a little breakdown of what life events have gotten us to the point we are at now.

I’m going to put it in bullet form, so it doesn’t get obnoxiously wordy.

Childhood 1988-2001

• Pretty “typical”  on my end- we moved a lot, dad struggled with addiction but for the most part, it seemed “normal” to me as a kid

• I know for my mother, having an alcoholic husband was a challenge, but I cannot speak to that as it is not my story to share

• I also know that my brother had childhood struggles: being gifted, younger than his peers, smaller, experiencing bullying, father’s expectations. These struggles weren’t known to me as a kid, I was the naive baby sister and he was my big, strong, heroic brother

June 2001

• Car accident- this story could take up pages.

• Condensed version: My mother and I were hit by a driver under the influence who was stealing a truck from his previous place of employment. We were on our way to the hospital (ironically) to visit my grandfather.  The man who hit us ran a red light, hit the passenger side of our van where I was seated. I was in the ICU for 2 weeks, doctors telling my parents they didn’t know if I would live or die. I have no memory of this. I was later described as resembling Linda Blair (The Exorcist)- hair was a mess, I was thrashing out and pulling IV’s out of my arms. I had a Traumatic brain injury along with broken bones and internal injuries. Once stable, I was moved to a Children’s Specialized Hospital where my long recovery began. I had to relearn to walk, talk, eat, dress myself, bathe myself; basically function as a “typical” human being. My first memory was waking up in a hospital bed. My dad was seated next to me and I asked him where I was. When he explained what happened, I didn’t believe him. My father later told me that that conversation has happened between us many times. My memory was shot. My brother helped with my memories and getting me to talk again, by writing back and forth to me using “AOL IM” language (cool at the time). After 6 weeks, I returned home for outpatient rehab. I had to keep going to the hospital for 2 more weeks but I could sleep at home. Walking was a struggle still as I had significant nerve damage on my right side. I still have injuries from this accident that I’ve learned to just live with and in the 4 years following the accident, I had to continue getting treatments and surgeries for injuries obtained and the legal case post-accident. I guess my longest lasting reminder of the accident is my sense of smell being gone (yes! I can’t smell anything) and my loss of childhood memories.

2001-2006

• Car accident recovery

• Surgeries

• Negatively affected high school experiences and socialization

• Legal interviews and court cases having me relive the experiences and injuries

  • Definitely led to some PTSD causing my own self harm and need for therapy

2006

• Parents officially separated based on dad’s addiction

2007

• Brother entered rehab for the first time

2008-2011

• College life, more moving a lot, back and forth between mom and dad, dysfunctional boyfriends

2011

• Moved back to AZ

2012

• Relationship with Bobby (post Iraq) started

• Dad diagnosed with cancer

2013

• Finished undergraduate degree

• Moved to KY to wait for Bobby to get out of army- his PTSD and physical ailments progressively got worse and I chose to act as caretaker!

• Dysfunctional boyfriend’s family- not a good situation to be in so I chose to leave

• I moved to upstate NY to be with my dad and help take care of him during his last months battling cancer

Feb. 2014

• Dad dies of cancer- I fall apart

• Weight gain struggles begin- I believe this was a trigger for my hypothyroidism and Hashimoto’s

2007-2018

• George continues to struggle with mental illness, multiple suicide attempts, and addiction to self medicate

2014-2016

• Move KY, AZ, VA- work and relationship

2016-2020

• Dysfunctional relationship in VA with Bobby

• In order to feel a sense of control, I overworked myself and became very angry, bitter, resentful

• Bobby fed me lots of empty promises to keep me around or to ease his own guilt- who knows

• Weight gain significantly increases as I experience more stress, loss and instability in life

• Infertility- we attempted fertility treatment for 3 months: meds and injections are not your friend!!!

2018

• George dies of suicidal overdose- I will never forget this day and the summer leading up to it- My version of this will come later

2018-2019

• Mom lives with us (me and Bobby) as she copes and goes through her grieving process

• I struggle to protect her and heal at the same time

2019

• Diagnosed with hypothyroidism

• Began fertility treatment- I will restate- worst mistake ever! Meds and injections ARE NOT your friend!

Feb 2020

• Relationship ends- after years of lies and deceit, Bobby finally decides to be honest about the fact that he never wanted anything that I wanted and he just went through the motions and fed me the lines. Why? I wish I knew and I wish I had been stronger because I should have left him many years prior. But I guess the 8 years of dysfunction made me stronger and who I am today.

March 2020

• I bought my own condo and moved out- INDEPENDENCE at last!

• Pandemic begins- seriously though?! But honestly, the solitude and isolation was actually a blessing for my own self growth and development as an individual

June 2020

• Over the past few months, my thyroid seemed to be getting worse/triggered

• I became that obnoxious patient and harassed my doctor until I was referred to a specialist

• Endocrinologist- Immediately knew by looking at me and hearing a bit of my story

• Diagnosed with Hashimoto’s Autoimmune Thyroiditis- this diagnosis was the answer I had been looking for

• Began treatment and continued my intense diet and exercise regimen

  • Synthroid dosage increased

  • Gluten free

  • Dairy free

  • Soy free

  • Low sugar

  • My diet mainly consists of coffee, protein (fish, chicken, eggs) and vegetables

  • Calorie deficit

  • 1 hour HIIT daily

  • Yoga

  • Mindfulness/meditation/relaxation

July 2020-December 2020

• Lost 80 pounds

• Got life on track

• Done with basing decisions on relationships

• Ready to move forward 

There are a lot of details left out, that will be expanded on in later blogs

Life is tough, but remaining strong and confident helps us to push through the difficult times and keep moving forward.

Sometimes I wonder why, what’s the point, but:

Life is a gift, there are so many beautiful and magnificent things out there to experience.

I spent a lot of time waiting for someone else to make my life happen; I now am going to make my own life happen and live each day to the fullest.

If my story, my mother’s story, my brother’s story, my father’s story; can be an inspiration or motivational tool to just one person, then I can feel that we accomplished something.

This foundation is to provide support to anyone in any way. Yes, we have our target goal of reaching children and supporting their mental health, but difficulties and struggles take place daily, in multiple formats.

Be inspired by what connects to you.